I (f30) has been close friend with, Let’s call her Amanda (f32), for over 10 years. Amanda is going to have a small wedding this summer with her closest friends and family. I’m so happy for Amanda and her bf(m37), I’m honored to be invited and I really want to go. But I will not attend the wedding. This is because her childhood friend (f33) Lucy is going to attend. I have known Lucy for the same amount of time that I have known Amanda, but we have never been close as I have always felt something to be off with her.
About 3 years ago Lucy tried to have an affair behind my back with my husband (m32) that I have been with for 10 years. Lucy would always go out to the bar where my husband was, being flirty. But as soon as I meet up with my husband she would disappear.
Which afterwards seems a bit sus. One time they got drunk and he listened to her when she was sad after her marriage had fallen apart. Amanda told Lucy to stop being flirty with my husband.
At the time I thought they were just friends. And I want to add that husband thought so too. He has given me text proofs and timestamps so I know nothing happend between them. Other friends who also was there have told me that nothing happened between my husband and Lucy, so I trust him.
But this really started when we were out for dinner with Amanda, Lucy, another couple, me and my husband. When my husband had gone out for a smoke she had followed him outside and confessed she’s was in love with him, and that she had been in love with him for over a year. He rejected her. My husband and I didn’t want anything to do with her after that. The day after Lucy lied to Amanda promising she had apologized to me and that we had worked everything out, but Lucy never even once contacted me. We would occasionally randomly see each other as we live in the same city. But she would always pretending that she didn’t see me. If she saw me she would turn on the spot and walk away. And that’s fine I thought, if she doesn’t want to talk to me, fine, I didn’t want to talk to her either.
Half a year later shit really hit the fan. I was in a restaurant with my husband and a couple of friends having a nice dinner. When Lucy stormed in to the restaurant extremely drunk. Lucy had heard from Amanda by accident (because Amanda was invited, but didn’t go) that I was at that restaurant. So Lucy went there without me knowing or inviting her. Lucy started directly screaming at me, grabbing my shoulders and shake me, screaming that “I have forgiven her” (which I had not as we had not spoken for over a half year) and that she’s been trying to seduce my husband behind my back and that she loved him. I didn’t know what to do, so I started sobbing trying leave, but Lucy wouldn’t let go until my husband and my friends forced her to let go of me. Then we all got away from the restaurant asap. This was very scary and I’m still scared of her til this day. Both my husband and friends who was there are also afraid of her after this incident. But my bf and friends all have been supportive of me.
Last year I had high fever and couldn’t attend Amanda’s birthday party. But my husband and his younger brother (m27) did go. Lucy had promised Amanda not to create a big drunk mess again. But as soon as she got a bit too drunk she did the same thing again, but towards my husband, confronting him and screaming at him. He got angry and told her to stop. He left the party after this, but his brother stayed. Later that night she tried to seduce my husband’s younger brother. Trying to sit in his lap touching him all over, and badmouthing me and my husband. My husband’s brother thought it was absurd and sad.
After that I haven’t meet Lucy. But she tried to talk bad about me to my best friend (f30) (they have only meet once at Amanda’s place), Lucy told my best friend that it’s not a big deal to have an affair and that she should be forgiven by everyone’s marriages she have ruined, which apparently is many.
Amanda has been very understanding and supportive of me. She’s said sorry many times, which I told her she doesn’t have to do as this is all Lucy’s fault, not Amandas. Amanda is angry at Lucy and have tried to stop her behavior, but they have known each other their whole lives and their parents and neighbors so I understand that they have a special relationship. I’m not angry with Amanda at all, as she’s the kindest, sweetest person ever.
Lucy did last summer cheat on her then boyfriend with my friend (m30) who didn’t know Lucy was in a serious relationship at the time. Apparently Lucy’s then boyfriend figured what had happened and had called Lucy crying right after she sleept with my now friend. My friend heard the phone call and felt tricked by Lucy. Lucy also has had an affair with her boss who has a wife and kids. I do not believe Lucy’s behavior has gotten better, only worse these past 3 years. So I have no intentions of forgiving Lucy or becoming her friend again.
Now Lucy is going to attend the wedding, and I’m so scared that Lucy will get drunk again, ruin the wedding by screaming at me or my husband. And I know that it’s not mine nor Lucy’s big day it’s Amanda’s, but I’m afraid that if I’m there Lucy is going to get drunk and scream at me again. Am really afraid of Lucy. My husband doesn’t want to go either because of Lucy. And I know I should just hold my head up high and go for Amanda’s sake. But I just don’t know what to do if Lucy starts screaming at me as I will probably start crying again. So I’m not sure what to do.
