I’m Alex (22M) and I have three older cousins, Michelle (42F), Ryan (36M), and Luke (31M). I was the youngest in the family and grew up closest to Luke, since we lived in the same house during my teens.

Luke has always been into fitness and sports. He started training in high school, went semi pro in college, and even now looks like a model. I followed his lead, hit the gym, stayed fit, and kind of became his mini version. I also tried bonding with the others: took art classes with Michelle, binged sci-fi with Ryan, but never got as close to them.

Ryan, in particular, has always been bitter. He blames his lack of dating success on his looks. Sure, he’s a bit out of shape and balding, but the real issue is his bad attitude, always complaining, negative, and kind of loud. He thinks Luke and I are dumb just because we work out. Never mind Luke has a PhD and I’m top of my class.

A few months ago, I was casually seeing a girl, and she picked me up from my parents’ place. That’s when she briefly met Ryan. The next day, she showed me the weird messages he sent her, complimenting her, asking her out, asking if she saw his message, begging her not to tell me, then suddenly insulting her when she didn’t reply. She blocked him, and we agreed not to make a scene about it.

Recently, I split from the casual relationship and moved back in with my parents temporarily. Ryan, who still lives there too, mocked me the second I walked in and calling me a rejected gym bro and comparing my breakup to his experience of being judged for his looks.

I’d had enough. I told him it’s not his appearance, but his creepy, off putting behavior that drives women away and reminded him of the messages he sent to my ex. He got angry and my mom told me I was being harsh since Ryan’s already struggling.

So, AITAH?