My girlfriend (29F) moved into my apartment about six months ago. We’d been together for a year, and things felt solid. When she moved in, I told her not to worry about rent. I was in a stable place financially, and honestly, it felt good to be able to provide that. It was my apartment, I had it covered, and I wanted her to feel at home.

But life doesn’t always stick to the script. A few things hit me at once, unexpected bills, fewer hours at work and now I’m stretched thin. I’m not bankrupt, but I’m carrying more than I can afford to without it affecting other parts of my life. I’ve been losing sleep, skipping small things just to keep up, and rent is the biggest chunk of it.

So I finally sat her down and told her the truth: I need help. I asked if she could start contributing something to the rent. It didn’t have to be 50/50, just anything to ease the pressure a bit.

She didn’t get upset, but she went quiet. She said she thought I was covering it because I wanted to, and that bringing this up changes things for her. That it shifts the dynamic of our relationship, and she’s not sure what to make of it.

Since then, things have felt… off. She’s been distant, like the conversation built a wall between us. And now I’m stuck wondering if I did something wrong just by being honest.

The truth is, I still care deeply about her. I didn’t ask her out of resentment. I’m not trying to “make her pay her way” or keep score. I just needed to be real about where I’m at. I thought that’s what being in a relationship was about, showing up for each other, especially when things get hard.

But maybe I should’ve handled it differently. Maybe asking was unfair after I’d said she didn’t have to pay in the first place.

So yeah, AITA?