i’m a 27F bisexual woman who hasn’t disclosed to my parents yet. My girlfriend (29F) of eight months wants to come out to them together next week at their anniversary dinner.

Here is the problem: My brother (24M) just came out as gay last month and my parents are still working through it. So they weren’t horrible about it but my dad’s attempted humor was awkward, and my mom cried about grandchildren. Things are awkward but getting better. My brother went through a lot with my parents initial reactions and is just getting to a decent place with them now.

I explained to my girlfriend that I wanted to wait a few months to give my family some space. She was really upset and saying that I was ashamed of her and our relationship.

She does not understand that this is not at all about her, it is about not abruptly inserting myself into my brother’s coming out journey, I don’t want to take away from my brother’s coming out. Also, I feel like going to bad my parents dinner after everything is (to put it lightly) inappropriate.

Yesterday, my girlfriend gave me an ultimatum: come out at the dinner, or we are done. I told her I was not going to do that to my family right now. She packed a bag and is going to stay with her friend.

I love her so much, but am I in the wrong for wanting to wait on this announcement